Lindsay Lohan doesn’t do drugs

…and it’s my fault, and the fault of people like me, that she can’t get any work. Lindsay Lohan, I really want you to get a grip right now and try—just TRY—to get a little perspective about your ridiculous, surreal existence. Otherwise, you’re liable to continuing making insane statements like this:
“I don’t drink, I don’t do drugs and I don’t lie,” she said. “I love to act and write and be creative, and I want to help people by playing characters that can send a positive message out to whomever may need it.”
Great. Do it. I don’t remember ever standing in your way, Linds.
The 22-year-old did, however, acknowledge that while her record of being in the public eye hasn’t always been a pristine one, she has changed—it’s the “noise” surrounding her that has not.
“…If people would just leave my personal life alone—because it’s really not that interesting—then I could land a great role. But all the sicko fans and the noise is so distracting.”
Oh. Wait. Damn. I guess we have gotten in Lindsay’s way. I didn’t realize I was making so much noise over here with my ridiculously loud typing.
“I just want to live the dream that I’ve worked so hard for since I was 4 years old,” she said. “I’d like to have my own charity, do work overseas, be in Oscar-nominated films, write movies, produce movies/shows/videos, design clothes, make music, write books, etc.” [Source]
You are the master of your own destiny, Lindsay! If you’re as classy and well adjusted as you claim to be in the rest of this interview, you should have no trouble going out and making all this stuff happen. And you know, if it’s really too loud for you out here, buy a good pair of earplugs and stay inside for a while.